My Idea is that instead of Romeo and Juliet killing themselves, Juliet is forced to marry Parris and Romeo is thrown in prison. This is the scene of their FINAL departure.
(SCENE I: OUTSIDE OF ROMEO’S CELL IN THE OUTSCIRTS OF VERONA)
Romeo: This sun marks the day of her final leave,
It has been ten years since I saw Juliet.
My heart is scorn from the absence of her
And each second seals the end of my love.
Nurse: (Aside) now is my chance to reunite the two
And end the forsaken love of Juliet!
For Paris hath made a villain of man
From when he laid his hands on my master.
(Below his window) Romeo! Romeo! Hear these words I speak of.
Since the day you hath depart, Juliet would
Rather be dead than live without thy love.
The man she married is nothing to thee
And she longs for your loving and thy heart.
I remorse at the many poor mistakes
That i hath made about thy caring soul
For thee are not a dishclout to Paris;
But must be the one to clean up my spills!
Romeo: Nurse! These words thou speak may utter the truth,
But I am locked in this cell with no hope
Of seeing the face of Juliet again.
Nurse: No more! My declining hear can not bear,
To see my daughter live without thine love.
I shall come when the sun breaks the dark night,
With a ladder to descend thou to me
And reunite thee with her and break free.
(SCENE II: JULIET TALKING TO PARIS IN THIER HOUSE)
Paris: My star, it has been a week since thou shined.
Thou light can not shine in the solitude
Of thine own presence and not a soul more.
I long to see the Juliet I once loved.
Juliet: How can thee utter the words of my love.
I never and will never feel that way.
Thou are the blackness that engulfs my soul;
Love can not be brought from a fathers hands.
Paris: Thou does not mean what you say in these words.
Thou Romeo is a convict and a scrap.
Take pitty on me for saving his soul
For I am the one who jailed and not killed.
Juliet: Romeo returned and to me is the blame
For I am the one who he came back for.
(rise) Thee took my true love and for that I hate!
(Edits off stage crying)
(SCENE III : OUTSIDE THE JAIL)
Romeo: The sun hast set over the horizon,
But my dear nurse is nowhere to be seen.
Oh Nurse, Rescue me from my solitude!
Nurse: I am here to reclaim the love that was
Once so envious and dear to my heart! (throws rope) Grab onto thy love that was once e'er yours!
(He climbs down)
We have little time before they realize
That thou are gone as silent as the wind.
(SCENE IX: JULIET AND ROMEO MET ONCE AGAIN)
Nurse: (approaches) Move stealthy, for the guards are near-by.
From here thou shall take your own path to her.
Juliet lies dormant where thee first met her,
Go to her and make her complete once more.
(Romeo heads to the balcony and climbs)
Romeo: (aside) What a majestic beauty that lies here.
Shall I wake her from sleep, or –
Juliet: - Romeo! (speechless) O Romeo! Thou hath come to me in time!
Romeo: Zounds! To hear thy ravishing voice once more
Is to fix dwindling hope for Juliet.
Juliet: But why, my husband, have thou come to me?
For quickly they notice thy departure,
And the punishment is sure to be death.
Romeo: Death be just another part of my life,
And my life without thee is death to me.
Juliet: I would rather have thee alive than dead;
Thou are my hope and all that I live for,
Oh Romeo! What have thee gotten into?
Romeo:O my love! I spend this one night with thee
And die in the morn had been with thy love,
Rather than live out my all life alone.
O Juliet, make this last night purposeful.
For when the sun does put to death the moon;
A new star shall be waiting in the sky.
This was really good. Your writing flows and it feels very much like real Shakespeare. I also liked how you separated your piece into different scenes. One minor comment though, wasn't Nurse enthusiastic about Juliet marrying Paris? She even called Romeo rags compared to Paris. Maybe her mind changed over the last 10 years. You could add something small like that.
TorontoBlueJays
I loved it! I liked how Romeo still had the attitude of dying with her love than living without.
(SCENE I: OUTSIDE OF ROMEO’S CELL IN THE OUTSCIRTS OF VERONA)
Romeo: This sun marks the day of her final leave,
It has been ten years since I saw Juliet.
My heart is scorn from the absence of her
And each second seals the end of my love.
Nurse: (Aside) now is my chance to reunite the two
And end the forsaken love of Juliet!
For Paris hath made a villain of man
From when he laid his hands on my master.
(Below his window) Romeo! Romeo! Hear these words I speak of.
Since the day you hath depart, Juliet would
Rather be dead than live without thy love.
The man she married is nothing to thee
And she longs for your loving and thy heart.
I remorse at the many poor mistakes
That i hath made about thy caring soul
For thee are not a dishclout to Paris;
But must be the one to clean up my spills!
Romeo: Nurse! These words thou speak may utter the truth,
But I am locked in this cell with no hope
Of seeing the face of Juliet again.
Nurse: No more! My declining hear can not bear,
To see my daughter live without thine love.
I shall come when the sun breaks the dark night,
With a ladder to descend thou to me
And reunite thee with her and break free.
(SCENE II: JULIET TALKING TO PARIS IN THIER HOUSE)
Paris: My star, it has been a week since thou shined.
Thou light can not shine in the solitude
Of thine own presence and not a soul more.
I long to see the Juliet I once loved.
Juliet: How can thee utter the words of my love.
I never and will never feel that way.
Thou are the blackness that engulfs my soul;
Love can not be brought from a fathers hands.
Paris: Thou does not mean what you say in these words.
Thou Romeo is a convict and a scrap.
Take pitty on me for saving his soul
For I am the one who jailed and not killed.
Juliet: Romeo returned and to me is the blame
For I am the one who he came back for.
(rise) Thee took my true love and for that I hate!
(Edits off stage crying)
(SCENE III : OUTSIDE THE JAIL)
Romeo: The sun hast set over the horizon,
But my dear nurse is nowhere to be seen.
Oh Nurse, Rescue me from my solitude!
Nurse: I am here to reclaim the love that was
Once so envious and dear to my heart!
(throws rope) Grab onto thy love that was once e'er yours!
(He climbs down)
We have little time before they realize
That thou are gone as silent as the wind.
(SCENE IX: JULIET AND ROMEO MET ONCE AGAIN)
Nurse: (approaches) Move stealthy, for the guards are near-by.
From here thou shall take your own path to her.
Juliet lies dormant where thee first met her,
Go to her and make her complete once more.
(Romeo heads to the balcony and climbs)
Romeo: (aside) What a majestic beauty that lies here.
Shall I wake her from sleep, or –
Juliet: - Romeo!
(speechless) O Romeo! Thou hath come to me in time!
Romeo: Zounds! To hear thy ravishing voice once more
Is to fix dwindling hope for Juliet.
Juliet: But why, my husband, have thou come to me?
For quickly they notice thy departure,
And the punishment is sure to be death.
Romeo: Death be just another part of my life,
And my life without thee is death to me.
Juliet: I would rather have thee alive than dead;
Thou are my hope and all that I live for,
Oh Romeo! What have thee gotten into?
Romeo:O my love! I spend this one night with thee
And die in the morn had been with thy love,
Rather than live out my all life alone.
O Juliet, make this last night purposeful.
For when the sun does put to death the moon;
A new star shall be waiting in the sky.
This was really good. Your writing flows and it feels very much like real Shakespeare. I also liked how you separated your piece into
different scenes. One minor comment though, wasn't Nurse enthusiastic about Juliet marrying Paris? She even called Romeo rags compared to Paris. Maybe her mind changed over the last 10 years. You could add something small like that.
TorontoBlueJays
I loved it! I liked how Romeo still had the attitude of dying with her love than living without.
NewYorkYankss